Blue Is the Best Light
by MachinaGlory
Summary: Proffesor has found a new student to join the team, a girl with a dark past and even darker thoughts. And what will the other students and falculty think of this girl, especialy a little blue fuzzy dude?
1. Just a mental note

This basement, it's so cold. A lot colder since the noises from upstairs stopped and the water heater went dead. I'm freezing my ass off, even with this thick fabric around my shoulders and covering my face. The old jeans are torn and worn through along with my black tanktop. My newest outfit, ruined. I just got this three years ago! Guess that's why they're mad at me.

Them being my world. The two people I love more than anything, who I would die for. My parents.

Yeah sure they threw me in here, but they said it's for my own good. They said the world would hate me if I came up. They even terach about things by home schooling me! Mom is my own teacher and always gives me fun things to do like Geometery, and Calculus, and English. The worksheets are the best to do and she's always proud of me! Dad too! That makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside!

However...

It's been two weeks. Two weeks since I've last eaten. I haven't heard the usual shuffling of feet from my parents up stairs. No one has come to check if I'm still alive or bring me food. Did they leave me? Is it okay to come up with out them crying?

I stand and walk away from my pity corner, legs shaking with hunger...and fear. My long black cloak drags behind me and covers my face.

They haven't looked at me since I turned six, Mom even taught me behind the door, slipping my textbooks in when I sleep. All hope of them truely loving me is lost. All hope of a normal life lost long ago. Ever since these damn mutations popped up nothing's been normal. Hell even before then nothing was normal, but we at least pretended back then.

The old wooden stairs creak underneath my light footsteps. The door lies just ahead of me. I can see the crack of light and even that little bit felt warm to me. Beyond this wooden door is warmth, light, food. All things I'm craving at the moment. This beat down door that I could destroy with one flick of my wrist.

Maybe we can start over if I come out into the light. Maybe they'll love me again. Maybe I don't look that bad in the light.

I reach for the silver doorknob, touch it, feel it's cool metal through my gloves.

Then again...

What if they hate me? What if I look worse in the light? I don't want to see Mom cry or hear Dad yell at me. I don't want them to get mad and throw me back down again. That hurt. They must be so mad at me for running around in the crawl spaces. They stopped feeding me after that. I just wanted to show them what I can do. To make them understand. To say "hello" after not seeing them for so long.

They don't understand. They will never understand. The fear, the hatred, the disgust I have for myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself! Mommy why don't you love me any more? Daddy why can't we watch football or wrestle any more? HUH? WHY? I DON'T UNDERSTAND!

My hand falls and so do I. I drop to the top stair and hold my legs close to my chest, tears filling my eyes.

"This isn't my fault! It's not my fault!" My head is throbbing, voices racing through it telling me it is. That I should just die. I bring my hands to my head, rainbow colored tears slipping from my red eyes with black background. "Stop it! I didn't do this!"

"No, you didn't." I jerk up. This is a new voice, the only one who has actually agreed with me. Let alone, it was a deep soothing voice from a man. Not the harsh cut throat voices I'm use to. "You didn't do this, Lucridias."

"I-I didn't?" The voice seems too real for me not to talk to, and who the hell can actually see me? "B-but they told me _I'm _the problem. I am, I know I am."

"No, you're not. Never think you are the problem. People just need to get use to mutants. That's all."

Who does this guy-voice think he is? He's supposed to always agree with me and remind me how much of a freak I am. Stop telling me other wise head-voice! "Yeah well you know, my parents had nine years to get use to my mutation. They haven't yet." I hold my shoulders, rubbing the dirty fabric. "They still haven't, and they hate me. I don't blame them though. I'm a monster."

"No you are not. Your parents are the monsters. No person should have to go through what you do. It isn't right." The piecesof my heart throb to life with those words. I'm _not _a monster? Is he calling Mom and Dad liars? How dare he!

"Guess you're that tiny bit of hope left in me, huh?" I pull the black hood down lower, so it completely covers my eyes. A light buzzing becomes audible in the back of my head. This same annoying buzzing that has bothered me for a week now. My mind races, finds a spot, sees a man. He's bald with piercing blue eyes with a weird metal cap on his head with many tubes coming from it. A deep purple aura shines around him with a few teal sparkles floating around in the mix. "No, you're a mutant. A psychic named Charles Xavier." I smirk, showing off my sharp canines. "Mr. Xavier it's best to stay out of my head." I slam down thick mental doors in my head. "This is as far as you can go."

He chuckles. "You're a smart girl, Lucridias. If you know who and what I am, do you know why I've finally contacted you?" In my mind, he smiles. A truely warm and sincere smile that makes me feel warm and, whats that feeling...? Is it safe? I like it.

"Finally?" I pause. The buzzing, him creeping inside my skull. Deep into the dark memories that have caused so much pain, so many scars. He knows me inside and out, watched me,_ judged _me. "You've been here a week, haven't you? How deep have you gone in?" This man, no matter how safe he makes me feel, still invaded my mind and crawled around. Worst is, I almost trusted him. Never underestimate psychics. My claw-like black nails reach up for my neck, scratching it. Nervous habit.

"Don't worry I haven't gone in too deep. I just wanted to figure out your powers and a little of your life slipped through."His eyes are filled with sadness.

And pity.

"_How _little?" Okay, now I'm growling. Well I'm pissed, why shouldn't I?

"First, stop scratching your neck. You're bleeding." I do. "Good. I've only seen that your father threw you down the basement stairs and that you have markings. Nothing mind wrecking I'm sure." I cling to myself. That first day was the worst. The broken teeth and blood every where, it sucked ass.

"Just stay _out._ It's an invasion of privacy and you're really pissing me off." A slight shutter escapes my throat as I force the memory back in my head. "Charles Xavier, I'm guessing the Charles Xavier of Xavier's School For Gifted Youngsters." I've read about him in loose newspaper clippings that Dad tried to burn.

The schoolwas under investigation by the FBI and Secrete Services when they thought the children where being abused. They spent about a week there and found it was only the intence P.E. classes with Professor Logan. I remember a quote: "They train these kids worse than the comander trained us in the military! It's almost as if they're being trained for a war..." I remember it because it made me laugh, the first time in a long time.

"Guessing that doesn't mean it's a prep school forthe buff if you're inviting me, especialy in this way, huh?" I dig my nails into my shoulders. "You're tracking me too. You obviously want me to join the school desperatly, don't you?"

"Yes. I think you'll find my school is a safe haven for people like you. People with natural abilities such as your own." He chuckles and grips the sides of his...wheelchair? He's a pshychic with a disability and showing it? Why doesn't he just use his powers to levitate and make it look like he's walking? It doesn't make scense...

"You mean freaks." Heard it before, the word leaves a sour taste in my mouth and a sting on my heart.

"No I mean Mutants. Geneticly altered beings." Again, that warming smile. "The next stage."

"The next stage?" It sinks in. I don't know if it's a psychic thing he's doing with my mind, but it truely does. I'm the next stage, like the first single celled organisms. "I like that."


	2. They Left?

He came the next day. Those same piercing eyes shine as much as his fare skinned scalp. It was funny to see my reflection on his head, but also terrifying to see what I really look like.

However, he wasn't alone.

Another mutant named Logan accompanied him, a man a bit shorter than myself with dark blue eyes. Everything about his appearance- his strangely parted navy blue hair, the stubble of a beard, mutton chops, bulging muscles- screamed mean and extremely violent. Surprisingly his aura tells a different story. It's a metallic gray indicating he's strong with the flecks of the mutant teal I've seen on Charles, but there are also flecks of red stating he's kind and loyal to those he trusts.

"Lucridias?" Charles calls through the door. "It's me, Charles. I have come to take you to our school."

"I-I know." I've been hiding in my corner, as far back and away from the light as possible.

"Well are you ready to leave?" His voice sounds almost worried and anxious.

Am I? Do I dare leave this dark, secluded, and disgusting hole in the ground? Should I disobey Mom and Dad's first and most important rule? If they come back and see I'm missing they will be so angry with me. Never have I even thought of asking to come out, let alone doing so with out their permission. It terrifies me to disobey after the last time. There are still so many scars that haven't and probably never will heal.

Then again I do want to go outside. Feel the sun on my face, smell freshly mowed grass. See all the color and people. Use all the knowledge in my head. I want friends, people who will smile at me and care about me no matter how I look. What should I do?

"Charles," my heightened sense of hearing forces me to listen to them. "It doesn't look like anyone lives here. Not for a while." His gravely voice echoes in my ears.

No one lives here?

"Yes I know. They moved with out her." He pauses and sighs. "Some people can be so cruel, even to their own kin."

Moved without me?

They left me behind? Is that why I haven't heard them upstairs? Did I do something wrong? What did I do to make them that angry? It must've been something horrible.

A red tear slides down my cheek. I can literally hear my heart break. Shatter to pieces. Then the pieces beat violently with rage. That's what lifts me up and carries me to the stairs.

They _left _me? How could they even think about doing that? Let alone do it! I'm their daughter! Their kin! Flesh and blood! They can't just drop all connections with me and leave! I'm not a toy! I'm biotic! I live and breathe! They can't just do that!

My hand slams on the wooden door, throwing it from it's hinges. Logan jumps to the right, barely getting out of it's destructive path as it flies across the room. A large thud as it hits the wall and the door is smashed into tiny little pieces.

My breathing is heavy and saliva drips from my mouth. The strange black markings on my skin crawl around and circuit with each loud pump of my shattered heart. I want death as vengeance. My body knows that, as it forces the circuits to freeze and turn to sharp pointed daggers.

I'm just glad my cloak covers it all.

"Hey! Watch it, bub! That almost hit me!" His sharp and deep voice startles me. Makes my heart skip a beat and forces me to calm down.

He scares me.

The sunlight streaming through the windows hits my face and enters my eyes, making them burn. Knowing my eyes, they will never adjust. With shaking hands, I grasp the hood of my cape and pull it down lower so it covers my enter face and bring soothing darkness. Then I step back into the darkness of just the first step.

The white light hurts.

"Logan, now we don't want her to be frightened, do we? keep that temper of yours in check." He faces me and smiles. "Lucridias, you don't need to hide. We will not judge you on your appearance. Why don't you show us your face?"

"I can't see," I whisper. "It's too bright." I keep myself glued to the spot, afraid of offending Logan. I see his nose scrunch and the face of disgust wash over him. I know, I stink. It isn't my fault. The last time I bathed was last month when it rained so hard the water flooded the basement. One of the many times I scared my mother with my daemonic appearance.

"S-sorry." That look on his face makes me slightly fidget in attempt to make it worse.

"Given the circumstances, it's alright. I'm sure you weren't able to bathe in a basement." How in Hell is he still smiling? "Please if you come with us we can at least clean you up and get you something to eat before you decide." I step forward and start roaming the house.

The room are all empty. The kitchen, dinning room, bed rooms all empty of everything. All of Mom's tiny nick-knacks, everything in Dad's man cave, every picture and bit of furniture gone. It's like they just snapped their fingers and vanished without me.

Those bastards.

I tried so hard for them. Made my heads throb with migraines from intense studying. Learned to draw and sing so they would accept me and be proud. Hell I spent the hours of the night training and learning how to hide my mutations, even if the physical ones won't go away. Not once did I question them or disobey an order!

This isn't fare! I gave everything to them! Everything I did was for them! Why couldn't they just keep me? Why did they leave?

"Lucr-"

"Just get me the hell out of here."


	3. Insane

"W-wow..." Okay let me just say this place is _huge. _It looks more like a castle than any school I've ever seen! Okay yeah I've only seen a public elementry school, but in books those places hardly compaired to this place.

It's three stories of gray brick with thick ivy vines scaling up the building and lots of clean low riding windows. There seems to be at least four wings to the place. A long driveway is begun by a high black iron fence that stretches around the facility and intercepts a small forest. The grass stands short and green, freshly mowed. Then to great everyone is beautiful marble angel. Her mouth turned up in a smile and looking like she'll protect us all from teh outside world. It gave me a nice safe feeling.

However she isn't the best part.

The best would be all the people outside. Kids running around playing sports, throwing frizbee. Some sitting under the trees talking and laughing. Having a good time while soaking up some rays. Human, er, mutant interaction.

I really want to try that.

"Alright Miss Onyx, Logan will show you to your room." Charles's voice brings me down from cloud nine. Great Logan is going to know where I'll be most of the time. Perfect. Just perfect.

Logan sighs, obviously annoyed by playing butler for the day. Or annoyed by me. "Come on kid." Does he ever use names? Either way I silently follow.

The whole way there is awkward. All I can do is stare at the ground. I don't want to talk, but I feel like I should say something. I mean he is taking time out of his schedual for this and he saved me. Then there is the fact I want to get on his good side because he scares the fuck out of me.

"Um," He looks over his shoulder. "Th-thank you." I blush lightly, though you can't tell with my _red_ skin. Yeah crimson.

"It's not me who you should thank. Charles was the one who found you." He lights a cigar. You kidding me? This is a school and he's smoking a _cigar_.

"Whatch out!" Something crashes into me, knocking me to the ground. My reflexews kick in a force me to hold my hood down over my face so no one sees.

"Nng... Sorry." It's a boy and his voice is thick with a German accent. I can feel fur where his skin should be. FUR?

"Geeze Kurt watch were you're goin." Logan lifts me up and sets me back on my feet.

"S-sorry. Kitty told me there was a new kid joining us ans I've got to meet them first!" He looks at me with a fanged smile so big he closes his golden eyes. "Hi, I'm Kurt Vagnar!"

He looks so cool! That navy blue fur, which is super soft by the way. That forked tail that swishes behind him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Making me watch it, hypnotized. How tall and athletic looking he was, his killer darker blue hair. How he only has six fingers and six toes. It was so cool. That and the fact he seemed comfortable with how he looked. Like he didn't care what so ever.

Plus he had these killer high elf ears.

"Oh sorry." He turns the dial on his watched embarrassed and dissapointed. Guess he doesn't like the way he looks. It's so sad.

Though his human form doesn't look half bad.

"Change back." He looks confused. Like I just asked him to get totally naked. "You look kick ass the other way. Besides, blue is my favorite color." I smile at him.

"You think so?" He changes back and gains swag. "I mean duh. Chicks dig the fuzzy dude!"

"Since you two have gotten on the right foot," Logan remarks turning around. "_You _can take her to her room." He waves behind him. "She's _you _problem now." I roll my eyes. That guy is a pain in my ass.

"Alright then. I still don't know your name though."

I hold out a shaking hand, and he almost flips out. I've got three long fingers with obviouse sharp claws tearing out of the leather glove. "L-Lucridias Onyx." He can't see the marking running up and down my skin with shame.

"Oh cool! You're just like me!" He grasps my hand and shakes it rapidly. "Man I've never met anyone like me before! Well only once and he's big a furry- You'll meet him later." He pulls me closer to him. "Hold on." Half a second later I'm surrounded by blue smoke.

And on the other side of the school.

I feel a ton of bricks hit me as the rest of me catches up. What a rush, I wanna do that again! Slowly I take a step back, a smile on my face.

"Niiiice." I trip over the back of my cloak and fall onto the bed. "God damn it." Of course this dude just has to laugh his ass off.

"S-sorry. It's just this day's sucked." He clears his throat. "Anyway, come down and meet everyone when you're done." I nod and he walks out, closing the door beind him.

"Woah." I sit up on the bed and pull my hood down. "Me be like him? Ha! He's freakin cool looking!" I drop my cloak on the bed and walk into the bathroom. Turning I see myself in the mirror. My spirel horns, blood red scaly skin, my long jet black hair, these stupid markings that crawl up and down my skin. "I'm a monster. A demon. No way am I cool like him." I slide off my clothes and step into the shower, turning on the freazing water.

The water races down my thin body thats withered to skin and bones, waves down my ribs that seem to pop out under the rough scales. The soap lathers and washes away the dirt, blood, adn stench and leaves behind a slightly smoother surface that smells like strawberries. My knee length black hair turns wavy and curly, dripping the lathering shampoo down my long legs that arch up so I stand on my toes, my two toes. Then there are dew claws on my ankles that can slice through just about anything.

The water feels really good right now. It seems to wash away all the bad memories and cool down my temper and hatered I have for myself. As I step out and wrap myself in a towel I stare at myself in the mirror.

'Freak.' No not these again. 'Why don't you just die demon?'

I grip my head and close my eyes. "Stop."

'Why? Does the little monster actually have feelings?'

"I'm not a monster. Charles told my I wasn't." My back hits the wall and I slide down.

'Do you really think he cares about you?' The voice snickers. 'Your own parents didn't care so why should this stranger? He doesn't care! He's using you!'

"Shut up!" My knees are pulled to my chest as I hide my face. "I know he doesn't care, I'm not stupid!"

'I'm the only one who is going to care about you. The only one who ever will.' I can feel arms around me. 'I do this because I love you.' Looking up I see myself. My arms around my shoulders. 'Trust only me. Only we can trust each other.'

I hug her back. "I know. I know. I'm sorry I yelled."

'You're lucky I'm nice.' She smiles at me, I just sit there emotionless.

The red light breaks my heart.


End file.
